Let's Be Treasonable

It seems that Rep. Spencer Bachus (R-AL 6th) (click on the link for that wonderful photo...I wonder if the photographer told him to try to look as if he might have a thought?) is desperate for attention. The half-wit Representative from Alabama has manufactured some outrage over the last episode of HBO's Real Time With Bill Maher. It seems that Spencer's lacey undergarments are in a wad over Bill's New Rules segment from the May 13th episode. Here is the portion of the segment that produced Spencer's discomfort. I've highlighted the offensive comment....

And finally, New Rule: The people in America who are most in favor of the Iraq war must now go there and fight it. The Army missed its recruiting goal by 42% last month. More people joined the Michael Jackson Fan Club. "We've done picked all the low-lying Lynndie England fruit." And now we need warm bodies. We need warm bodies like Paula Abdul needs...warm bodies!

Now, last week, a Baptist minister in North Carolina told nine members of his congregation that unless they renounced their 2004 vote for John Kerry, they had to leave his church. Well, if we're that certain these days that George Bush is always that right about everything, then going to Iraq to fulfill the glorious leader's vision would seem the least one could do. And, hey, if it makes it any easier for you, just think of it as a reality show: "Fear Factor: Shitting Your Pants Edition." "Survivor: Sunni Triangle." Or maybe it's a video game, "Grand Theft Allah."

Now, I know you're thinking, but, Bill, I already do my part with the "Support Our Troops" magnet I have on my Chevy Tahoe. How much more can one man give? Well, here's an intriguing economic indicator. It's been over a year since they graduated, but neither of the Bush twins has been able to find work. Why don't they sign up? Do they hate America or just freedom in general?

And that goes for everybody who helped sell this war. You've got to go first. Brooks and Dunn, drop your cocks and grab your socks! Ann Coulter, darling, trust me, you will love the Army. You think you make up shit!

Curt Schilling, b-bye! You ended the curse on Boston. Good. Let's try your luck in Fallouja. Oh, and that Republican Baldwin brother, he's got to go so that Ted Nugent has someone to frag.

But mostly, we have to send Mr. And Mrs. Britney Spears. Because Britney once said, "We should trust our president in every decision that he makes, and we should just support that and be faithful in what happens." Okay, somebody has to die for that. Or at least go. Hey, maybe she'll like it. Hell, she's already knocked up. That'll save the MP unit about ten minutes.

And think of the spiritual lift it will provide to troops and civilians alike when actual combat smacks the smirk off of Kevin Federline's face and fills his low-hanging trousers with dootie.

In summation, you cannot advocate for something you wouldn't do yourself. For example, I'm for fuel efficiency, which is why I drive a hybrid car and always take an electric private plane. I'm for legalizing marijuana, and so I smoke a ton of it.

And I'm for gay marriage, which is - oh, well, you get the points! All right, folks, thank you very much. You're a great crowd. Remember, we're taking a break, but we'll be back August 19th. Until then, "I'm Swiss!," my HBO Special airs July 30th at 10:00. I want to thank my guests, Senator Norm Coleman, Charles Barkley, Al Franken, Liz Marlantes and Gore Vidal. Thank you, folks. Appreciate it.

Once again, Bill Maher is being targeted for having an opinion that some people might take issue with. Apparently, Rep. Bachus believes that any dissent against the war or any well deserved sarcastic barbs against some military misdeeds borders on treason. Here's the actual accusation straight from the horse's ass mouth.

"I think it borders on treason," Bachus said. "In treason, one definition is to undermine the effort or national security of our country."

Bachus said he was appalled after watching a rerun of the show shortly after returning from a visit to Germany, in which he met with a paralyzed American soldier in the hospital. He has since written to Time Warner, HBO's parent company.

"I don't want (Maher) prosecuted," Bachus said. "I want him off the air."

Yes, let's get all of those offensive and treasonable voices banned from the airwaves. The government can only work effectively if all of those voices of opposition are silenced so that the administration can get the truth out to the people.

Feel free to contact Spencer and let him know you are appreciative of his efforts on your behalf.

Here's a link to some other important issues that are keeping Spencer busy.

UPDATE: Click here for Bill Maher's response to Bachus' pathetic bid for attention.