Bush Speaks

Well, Dumbya made his speech and everyone on MSNBC seemed to think it was the bestest ever.

For those of you who might have missed this great oration, let me give you the Cliff Notes...

My fawning GOP sycophants and anyone else who can stomach my smirking visage; here is a list of really cool ideas I have for making your lives wonderful during the next four years. I would have done 'em during the last four years, but some terrorists attacked Amerika and I had to take care of bidness; and bidness was good...especially for Haliburton (winks at Cheney). I really have no idea how to pay for all of these cool ideas, but I'll say anything to get re-elected. Hey, did I mention that Ronald Reagan was COOL.

Yada, yada, yada Osama who?....

I will fight the EVIL terrorists no matter where they hide. I will attack places that just look like terrorists might me hiding there. I am tuff and I swagger! Dick and I love and admire our soldiers; we even like to pretend we are soldiers too. Like magic, democracy will grow and thrive throughout all the countries we attack. I hear the voices crying out for liberty throughout the Middle East; although, I could hear them better if the those damn Chinese, yearning to be free, would just shut up.

Yada, yada, yada Sadaam BAD!....

God bless Christian, heterosexual Amerika!

Okay, it probably lost something in the translation... Just imagine the above given in halting lurches. He spoke like a grade school kid... talk a bit then smile vacantly while waiting for adulation from the grown-ups...touch yourself repeatedly so as to seem sincere.

It is not his fault, I suppose. Like Rick Santorum, I'm sure that he was raised to believe that being good at anything oral was verrry bad.