Friday, April 18

Shaken not stirred




I felt the earth move under my feet... but not much else. Our Indiana quake was a mere 5.2 and got everyone all excited here in the heartland. The news coverage was amazingly moronic, as one could expect. Playing all the live callers that reported the exact thing everyone else just experienced...ad nauseam. Then, one reporter asked a geologist what advice should be given to the viewers. I was hoping he would scream run for your lives you halfwits! It was a tremor for gods' sake; get over it.

I did see a picture of a damaged building in Louisville; I hope nothing fell on anyone I know;)

Of course, over on the IndyStar website, a former California resident weighs in...

Love the panic. I just don't get how those people function on a daily basis. Wife and I are from Los Angeles. She rolls over, says "wow, earthquake -- odd" and went back to sleep. I laid there a minute and chuckled, thinking of all the rednecks who just dialed 9-1-1. "Mah footons a shaken!" Relax, bubba. As long as a loaded shotgun don't hit da floor of the doublewide and discharge a shell into the hound dog, you'll be jes fine. I love the post here where the guy "held on" -- that's akin to running to the storm shelter on a cloudy day, dude.

I live in a trailer, have a futon and still thought this was funny. As a native Hoosier, I was not offended because I knew that such a description was accurate for a large number of my fellow residents. Unfortunately, the rednecks did not see the humor and fired back...

Ya... you "simply" are brilliant. Aren't you the cool one. We are all so impressed with you. I'd love for you to crawl back to that yellow hole (hell) they call LA and have an F5 tornado tear through your grungy little apartment.

and this one...

Granted, Indiana has more than its fair share of rednecks but... based on what goes on in California, I am not sure somebody from there has any authority to cast aspersions about others. Although I am surely not of the enlightened status that most left-coasters seem to boast, I will try to give you a few examples of rare occurences that could happen in Cali-land that would cause some consternation, such as an earthquake does here.

1) A rational, intelligent, independent thinking non-liberal
2) More rare, the above but in the form of a Hollywood actor
3) A person actually born in the US or at least a US citizen
4) Someone who has not had plastic surgery
5) A child born to a mother who is over 18, married, and not on drugs
5) A person who is not in a gang, hasn't been attacked by a gang, and hasn't been beated by LA cops
6) Heterosexuals

Hopefully, you get the irony. Have a good life.


Isn't it amusing that they don't consider themselves rednecks because they have a computer and can write.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

thanks for ur rundown on earthquake
i was thinking about u all...

marline said...

loved it.
Bob slept thru it of course. I was in the recliner reading the Star and everything shook. Broke 2 glasses in the dishwasher. And the Lion King fell off the wall. Which was good I've been trying to get that thing down for a year.
Marline